What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

Have you ever had a bad gut feeling about someone and it was right?

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

What do you mean son?

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Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

What! how could you do that?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

What are the beliefs of those who think climate change is a conspiracy theory? What do they predict will happen if we do not address it?

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

True - how I loved my mum!

How do I build rapport with anybody?

Do you know what she said mum?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

Atheists claim that Earth is 10 billion years old, yet there are no fossils that old. What do you have to say for yourselves for lying?

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”